Mommy Life and Times

I cried real tears when I realized I was just days away from my 40th birthday. Now, one year later, I feel better and more liberated than ever. This blog is a hodgepodge of topics & subjects pertaining to the mature woman regarding career, goals, children, finances, dating, credit, etc.

Friday, November 02, 2007

You're Pregnant!

Okay, so you just found out you are pregnant. If you planned this pregnancy, you are no doubt very excited and maybe a tad bit nervous. If this was an unplanned pregnancy, you may be filled with worry. Either way, here are some tips to help you get through the next week or so...

1. Relax and Breath...take deep breaths so you don't hyperventilate. Everything is going to be alright, I promise.

2. Before you panic or start telling everybody, please verify your pregnancy by going to one of those free centers or free clinics that offer the test or go see your doctor. It is rare, but sometimes you will be told yes on the little white stick on the at home pregnancy test, but it either isn't really true or you miscarry the baby very early own. Better be safe upfront.

3. If you are pregnant, time to start eating right. Even if you are a vegetarian you need to start eating healthy and drinking plenty of fluids for your baby.

4. Start taking your prenatal vitamins as soon as possible. If you are not yet pregnant but are trying to get pregnant, it is wise to start taking them now before you even get pregnant. This will help both you and your unborn baby.

5. Stop tanning, sunbathing, taking hot baths, steams, saunas, etc. I haven't seen any proof, but most doctors say the extreme heat can harm your baby.

6. No horseback riding until your doctor says it is safe which is usually not at all during the pregnancy.

7. Stay away from sick people as much as possible. There are too many germs floating around and the more you around sick people, the easiest it is to catch something. As you are very limited to the medicines you can take during the first trimester, it's best not to get sick if you can avoid it.

8. Sleep, rest, and sleep some more as much as you can.

9. Morning sickness may kick in around the seventh or eight week if not sooner. I have always found lemon heads (yes the candy) to help me with the nauseau.

10. Now is not the time to start dieting or take up a new sport. Please, for your baby's sake, take it easy.

bizybee06

Friday, May 18, 2007

Toddler Weaned at 27 Months

Yes, that's right. I finally weaned my son. He was 2 years old and three months at the time, but I still did it. For those of you who are unaware of my struggle with this, I gave birth to six beautiful children. The first five were all girls, and number six was my son. Needless to say he is a Momma's boy and my life is all the more better since he came into it. My older children do not live with me...they are from a previous marriage and reside in Georgia. Krystal is 21, engaged, and lives with her boyfriend. Bree is 19, a full time student, and resides with my parents. The baby of the bunch is Day Day and she is 16, a cheer leader, and was just elected President of her class. Day Day lives with my sister and her husband. I should also mention that my sister is pregnant with her first child-- a boy. Before you start to judge me, know that it was not my choice for them to remain in Georgia. But for obvious reasons when my husband and our two babies moved to Virginia three years ago they chose to stay behind. Wanting their happiness above all else, I reluctantly agreed.

Now, back to my son. In addition to the three "big" sisters he has in Ga, he also has two older sisters here in Virginia. Taylie is 8 and Marty Mar is 6. They spoil him rotten. He won my heart way back when I first learned he was a boy---that was at 20 weeks of conception. The pregnancy was a very difficult one and during it all, we moved from Ga. to Va. I have no regrets from having any of my children. They are all very different, unique and special in their own ways. I love them all! My son is the ONLY boy. Therefore I should not have been surprised when he passed the one year mark and was still nursing. I adamantly initially said that at one year he would be weaned. Then I moved it to 15 months, then 18 months, then by his second Christmas, and finally by the age of two. None of those time frames worked for us. I wasn't quite ready to give up the bond and he wasn't ready to let go of the closeness and convenience. Finally, I decided enough was enough. I think it was when he bit me....HARD, that I realized it had to end. Once I pulled away with a yell, I said, "That's it. No more. And I mean it." And i did.

It was a rough three days and nights, I had to walk him to sleep for the entire first few weeks, but it was worth it. Now I am able to put him to sleep by rocking him in our favorite bonding rocking chair. Hallelulah!! What a joy to be done with the breast feeding. Now, does anybody have any tips on how to potty train him???

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Nursing a 14 month old

Sometimes I feel like I am the only person in the world who nurses a baby older than a year. I can't even conclude a telephone conversation with family or friends without them saying, "Don't tell me you are still nursing that big old boy?!" I just want to cringe. Makes me feel defensive, yet upset that people don't understand why it is that I still nurse my 14 month old son.

I know that it is a personal decision, and I believe I am making the right decision for me and my child. However, a little support would be greatly appreciated. It isn't easy for me to continue nursing someone who weighs 25 pounds, has 10 teeth -- and counting--, and takes pleasure out of lifting my shirt at will during nursing sessions. However, I still believe that I should continue letting him nurse at least another few months or until he decides to wean himself.

A major accomplishment for me was deciding to no longer nurse him at the table. The first time I implemented this rule, he screamed and hollered all the way through dinnertime. Me and my family just politely tried to tune him out the best we could, but I held firm. No more nursing at the table....period! Withholding nursing rights at the table will hopefully cure his need to nurse at restaurants. Seems he felt like whenever he walked around and saw me sitting at a table or at the computer, I was supposed to be holding him and nursing. I have to admit that I no longer wanted to continue nursing him while trying to enjoy my meals.

This isn't easy. My girls nursed themselves at six months and nine months so imagine my surprise when my son kept nursing at a year and didn't seem like he was going to stop. People always said that boys are totally different from girls. I am definitely a believer now.

Tuesday, April 11, 2006

The Work at Home Mom - A man's Perspective

I would like to address the growing trend among women in today’s work force, the Work at Home Mom or “WAHM” as they are called. In several ways, I would like to commend, salute and brag on you ladies if I may. Having been exposed to this concept of Work at Home Moms by my Fiancé’ Shannan Hearne, who has been a WAHM herself for the better part of eight years, I am truly fascinated with this growing segment of our society. Shannan Hearne, Owner of Success Promotions, an Internet Marketing company has introduced me over the last two and a half years to this growing and truly amazing world of the Work at Home Mom (WAHM). Through her and many other wonderful ladies that I have had the pleasure and privilege to personally meet and correspond with, I have been given a broader scope of what hard work truly is.

So many men, myself included at one time, have been given the false notion that it is the man that makes the world go round. We have been lulled into the false notion that men are the only ones who are supposed to “work outside the home” and be the “bread winners” for our families, etc. In today’s world, and sometimes struggling economy, this could not be farther from the truth. In today’s modern age of new technology, competition for business and plain out hardship at times to make ends meet, this concept and visionary ideology of the work at home mom (WAHM) has helped shape a better American society. You ladies are a credit to America. Some men have the misconception that what you ladies do all day from home is “eat bon-bons” and watch soaps all day. I for one do NOT hold that belief. To the contrary, I challenge any man with this chauvinistic attitude and mindset to accomplish half the work in twice the amount of time that you industrious, motivated, cleverly inventive and talented ladies achieve on a tirelessly and never ending schedule.

I have personally witnessed the entrepreneurial spirit, the tireless dedication and arduous hours that some of you ladies possess and it fascinates me tremendously. You painstakingly and with much ingenuity run your businesses, and yet you find the time to manage your motherly and wifely responsibilities. Many of you are “Soccer Mom’s”, members of the local PTA, community volunteers, involved with political affiliations, chambers of commerce, and many other muti-faceted organizations. You are home nurse when one of your children has “ouchies”, and you are the gourmet chefs come dinnertime. You balance work and your careers with your home life responsibilities, and most of you do it quite admirably, without complaint and that is to be highly commended. A normal man, under the most optimum circumstances could not do what you do. I for one wouldn’t even want to try.

Through my experiences with the internet, I have met some wonderful WAHM’s who have businesses that delve into everything from Direct Sales, Marketing, Website design, Organizational development, business coaching, political awareness, and the list goes on an on. The creative ways that you ladies work, build your businesses, network with one another and lend each other support in a cooperative effort for the betterment of the entire WAHM community is remarkable indeed. You barter products and services with one another when finances are tight. You display an outstanding resolve to better yourself and your families.

I have had the pleasure to be affiliated with many of your WAHM owned and operated businesses and communities to include: Women’s Avenue, The Mom Pack, Wahm Planet, United WAHMS of America, Vendor Blender, Vendor Central USA, Wahm Spotlight, Republican Women Talk Radio, Wahm TV and so many others. I truly admire each and every one of you for what you do. You are a credit to America. I could not do what you do. I wouldn’t have enough hours in the day, to accomplish everything I needed to, and still find the time for so may other projects, commitments and responsibilities that you ladies do. To all of you who may read this letter, it is meant to give you some encouragement and the fortitude to keep pressing on. At times, I know that is discouraging when your businesses are falling slightly, finances are tight and current circumstances are slightly overwhelming. But what you do, is truly honorable, fascinating, admirable and most of all, rewarding. Keep up the good work Mom’s. You truly are a segment of our society that is helping to shape a better America. And I for one, being a man, recognize that and I wholeheartedly salute you.

Galen P. Sanderson Carolina Consulting

Article written by Galen P. Sanderson. Who is the owner and founder of the customer service consulting group called Carolina Consulting. To have Galen speak to your organization, inquire about Galen’s ad writing services, customer service consulting or to comment on this article, please contact him at: Galen@successpromotions.com

All content in this article is the property of Carolina Consulting, but may be widely distributed with the permission of the author
Galen P. Sanderson
Carolina Consulting
galen@successpromotions.com

Learning to Love Cooking

I hate to cook. I am forced to do it to provide nutritional value to my husband and kids, but I wish I didn't have to do it so often. I usually have to prepare meals at least three times a day for my family. Breakfast is usually a no brainer, grits and eggs and some type of turkey bacon or sausage, or cereal, or oatmeal, or muffins. Lunch is a little harder because I have run out of new ideas of what to feed everyone who is home for lunch on any particular day anything besides soup, mac n cheese, beefaroni, or a sandwich. Dinner, just plain intrigues me.

I have cooked chicken in every type of way imaginable, barbecue, fried, grilled, baked, even jamaican. My husband does not eat pork so there goes the pork chops I love so much. Talipia, catfish, flounder, salmon, and turkey meat are all staples in my home. Side dishes and deserts are another thing that slows me down. I am to the point where I am seriously considering paying a service to email me a weekly list of simple menus to prepare for my family.

Finding the time to do all of the cooking is another issue. Maybe if I didn't have to clean, get kids off to school, run my home business, do laundry, ironing, and chase my 14 month around the house all day I would have the energy and imagination to love cooking instead of loathing it. Dinner usually takes at least an hour out of my day to prepare. Followed by dishes and cleaning of the kitchen, I can expect to spend about two hours a day in the kitchen at night.

Somebody help me please! How do you learn how to love to cook. Are there any secrets or tips you care to share? How about your best menu ideas? What about baking? I would love to hear other people's opinions on this or advice. Don't leave a distressed mother hanging. Please help.

Monday, April 10, 2006

The Starbucks Allure

I love my cup of coffee in the mornings. French Vanilla and Hazlenut alternate as my two number one picks for my daily cup of joe. For the life of me however, I do not understand why so many people flock to Starbucks every morning and fork over three and four dollars for one cup of something that I can get a whole jar of in the grocery store. Granted, I would have to go home and boil the water for it every morning, but the name brand coffee I buy in the grocery store tastes excellent to me.

Want to know a secret, even the gas stations sometimes sell really good tasting coffee. Miller's right up the street from me sells French Vanilla Coffee for a little over a buck, and it is to die for. My ex-nanny actually turned me on to them.

Okay, okay. I am not knocking Starbucks. I too like to be pampered and feel like I'm one of the rich and famous. I have to admit that I buy coffee from Starbucks from time to time, but not everyday. My husband, for example, visits Starbucks daily. Part of my awe with them is that I can never figure out what to buy. There are rows and rows of different coffees you can buy from them. It makes my head spin and my eyes hurt just looking at them. I've tried listening in to see what other people are ordering, but haven't been successful at remembering the exact wording. I have also tried several different cups, but none of them seem to be able to measure up to my French Vanilla. So, for all of you Starbucks lovers out there, please write me and tell me what your favorite coffees are from them so I can try them out. If I can find the right one for me, who knows, I may become a daily Starbucks drinker too.

Late Nights

It's a little past midnight and I am sitting up typing on the computer while everyone else in the house is asleep. Everyone else, except for my 14 month old son who is nursing and watching me. This seems to be the norm nowadays--very little sleep for me and the baby wide awake along side of me. Noone ever told me growing up that all babies aren't the same. That some will be friendly, easy tempered, sleep through the night and overall what we consider to be "good babies". While other babies, like my son, require very little sleep, takes ten minute naps, are picky eaters, demanding, possessive of mommy, and still nurses past the one year mark with eight teeth (and counting) in their mouths.

Don't get me wrong, I absolutely LOVE my son. I love all my children, but I have only had girls before. He is my only son and is the last of six children. I had NO idea that boys were really that different from girls. Sure, I heard the rumors but I took them with a grain of salt. Now, barely able to keep my eyes open night after night I am a believer. But, I will get through it. My mother always said that "God will never put more on you than you can bear" and I have to believe that. This won't last. Nothing ever lasts forever.

In spite of it all, I still consider myself very lucky to have been blessed with my children. I would absolutely, positively never trade them for anything in the world. If staying up late at night working my VA business is a requirement to being a good mommy to them then so be it. I will do whatever it takes. But I will have it all. I will be a good mommy, a great wife, and an outstanding business owner because I have the drive, the will, and the know-how to be the best. One day I will look back on these days and wonder if I could have done it differently, done it better. The answer will probably be "yes", but I am happy with things just the way they are.

bizybee06

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